Warm wooden guts of unfinished walls and windows with turquoise bamboo shades provide a rustic backdrop for a redhead and a monkey exchanging smiles. A second monkey sits on her shoulder. Why is she dressed in leopard? Is she trying to scare them?

Speaking of monkeys, I was recently at Knott’s Berry Farm for the release of Knott’s Preserved, an AMAZING new coffee table book by Chris Merritt and Eric Lynxwiler, celebrating the history of the boysenberry farm that morphed into America’s first theme park by way of a Chicken Dinner Restaurant.

While I was standing in line for the book signing, this guy comes up and says he’s a fan of my books and has been to a couple of my slide shows. Before I can even say “Thank you,” another guy walks up and tells me the same thing. Then both guys look at each other and say “Hey! What are you doing here?” The first guy says, “Well, I like Knott’s.” The second guy says, “Well, so do I!”

As soon as the second guy walked away, the first guy says to me “Do you know who that guy is? That’s Hugh Hefner’s son.” To which I reply, “How do you know?” He says, “I’m Hugh Hefner’s butler!” The next thing you know, Mr. Hefner’s butler is inviting me to tour the Playboy Mansion.

The very next Sunday at 8 a.m., I am driving through the gates of one of the most iconic residences on Earth—home sweet home to a man whose contribution to the modern human condition is immeasurable. I was in awe. Touring the formal grounds of the old-world style mansion (which I saw from the outside because only Hugh’s guests are invited inside!), and being inside the famous swimming pool grotto is an experience I shall never forget.

And of course, around every corner I expected to encounter a playmate or two, or three, but no. Instead of playmates I saw primates. I had no idea the fearless leader of the sexual revolution keeps a menagerie of monkeys at his mansion. Did you?

Here’s to the lady in leopard, monkeys, Hugh, his butler, his son and KNOTT’S PRESERVED!

Charles Phoenix
May 27, 2010

A fair-haired little girl spoon-feeds herself ice cream while reclining in her pajamas on the couch. Color-wise, the trio of printed patterns that abound around her—the calico blanket, leafy slipcover and feathery wallpaper—are layered like the flavors of Neapolitan ice cream: strawberry, chocolate and vanilla.

If she needs a little light to eat by, that’s not a problem. The cherry on top of this ice creamy scene is the red-gathered plastic lampshade. A hand crocheted doily—the kind grandma makes—protects the end table top from the lamp’s scratchy ceramic base. This slide is marked “Patsy sick.” Everyone knows ice cream is good medicine. She enjoys the frozen sweet treat sensation the way it tastes best, right out of the half-gallon container. Thankfully, she placed the label so we could read it, because, of course, we want to know where that cream was sweetened, flavored and iced. It’s Pensupreme, a morph of its Liberty Bell state of origin and fine quality.I’m not sure if Little Miss Patsy’s faking it or if she really is sick, but either way, her dignity, poise and posture makes me think of “Whistler’s Mother,” an icon of American art painted in 1871 by James McNeill Whistler.

Here’s to Whistler’s Ice Cream Eater, ice cream colored interior décor and YOU!

Charles Phoenix
May 19, 2010

This spirited family portrait isn’t about the blond-framed oriental curios and paint by numbers hanging high on that very beige wall; the two-tired lampshade peeking on the right; dad’s magazine; the smiley boy; the smirky girl; or the TV guide with Phil Silvers on the cover. This slide is about the View-Master.

Considering the fact that just about every American household at one time or another has had a View-master it’s hard to believe that this is the one and only slide I’ve ever run across with one in it.

View-masters were introduced at the 1939 New York Worlds Fair. They were the modern Kodachrome, color alternative to the black and white stereoscope images that had been around since the Victorian era. Think of the transition like the moment in the Wizard of Oz when it goes from black and white to color. The Wizard of Oz came out in 1939.

View-Masters were born in the wonderful city of Portland, Oregon. They were the brainchild of a postcard manufacturer and a 3-D photographer. Originally they were sold at stationary stores and scenic attraction gift shops as an alternative to postcards. They were big success and quickly replaced the company’s postcard business.

Since the company began more than 70 years ago over 1.5 BILLION View-Master reels have been sold. WOW! Like SO many great Americana products, View-Masters are no longer made in Oregon. In 2000 the Beaverton plant closed and production moved to Mexico. ¡VIVA VIEW-MASTER!

Like most of you, I’m sure, View-Master was my introduction to the wonderful world of 3-D. Didn’t just about everyone have a View-Master?

Speaking of 3-D, please join me for my first ever 3-D slide show, CHARLES PHOENIX AND THE THIRD DIMENTION: THE BIG RETRO SLIDE SHOW + THE STORY OF 3-D IN 3-D! at 3 in the afternoon, Sunday, May 9 (Mother’s Day) and Sunday May 16th.at Los Angeles’s DOWNTOWN INDEPENDENT THEATER. Get your tix now – JUST TWO PERFORMANCES! It will be a 3-D extravaganza!

Here’s to the family on the couch, View-Master and YOU!
Charles Phoenix
April 15, 2009

I just couldn’t resist sharing this with you even though its way more Forth of July than Easter and, at first glance, looks more like a cake than Jell-O! This is the dessert I served at Downey’s former space ship factory during the finale of my “Up With Downey” Tour last Saturday. I wasn’t planning on serving an Jell-O American flag mold it just kind of happened.

To honor the astronauts and the legions aerospace engineers that worked in Downey on the Apollo mission in the 60s, I wanted to serve something very “space age” to my tourists while we were there. My trustworthy “slibrarian,” Teresa, suggested I go to Amapola Market in Downey and order a Jell-O mold. How perfect! I didn’t even know Jell-O molds were available for special order.

After perusing the Jell-O molds on display at Amapola I ordered a red, white and blue star-shaped mold. Little did I know fate had a more patriotic idea in mind. Sensing my Americana pride, the young lady behind the Jell-O mold counter pointed to the American flag hanging on the wall and asked if I wanted a Jell-O flag instead of a star. Um, uh, Yes! Needless to say, I absolutely couldn’t wait to see what an American flag would look like rendered in Jell-O.

When it came time to serve it to my tour group I hadn’t seen it yet. I wanted to be surprised along with everyone else. Finally, among the vintage space ship models and memorabilia that surrounded us there at the former space ship factory I gathered everyone around for the reveal. As I de-lidded the big pink box it came in we all gasped in perfect unison as our beloved American Flag jiggled before us on foil wrapped cardboard. Our Americana imaginations were inspired and patriotic spirits soared. Then we gobbled it up with pride! Wooo-wee was it good. Tasted just like candy!

Now I can’t wait for an excuse to see what else can be rendered in Jell-O, stay tuned!

Here’s to astronauts Jell-O flag pride and YOU!
HAPPY EASTER!

Los Angeles, CA
March30, 2010

A giant Amish couple lures tourists into America’s most charming miniature display. That would make Shartlesville the land of the giants and miniatures. The lady, looking retro rural in her bow tied bonnet and matching apron, seems to be petting an invisible dog. The man holding a pitchfork and waving what should be a gloved and sequined hand, looks just like the gloved one to me.

This is especially odd since these two have been sitting on the platform doubling as a billboard since, according to the guy that answers the phone at Roadside America, at least 1963. And, yes, they are still there. I didn’t have the nerve, (I thought it would be impolite) to ask him if anyone ever else ever noticed the resemblance.

Of all the classic roadside attractions in America, Roadside America is definitely on my top ten list of places I most want to visit. According to their site, it’s an unforgettable panorama of life in rural United States. The 6000 sq ft. exhibit spans more than two hundred years in time and lets you see, in exquisite miniature, how people lived and worked in pioneer days… through the years since then… right up to the present.

What they mean by the present is 1961, since nothing has been changed since Laurence T. Gieringer, the man who spent most of his life created the amazing experience, died that year. I hear the highlight of the show is when night falls over the display and Kate Smith sings “God Bless America”. If that’s not Americana… I don’t know what is!

Here’s to Michael Jackson, Roadside America, Kate Smith and YOU!

Los Angeles, CA
March 11, 2010

A giant paper mâché turtle on wheels trails a trio of local teen girls perched on a Chrysler product parading through he heart of town. The beautiful bubble windshield tells us it’s a Chrysler, but who cares what kind of a car it is when its covered from stem to stern in spellbinding stripes of buttercup yellow and sea-foam green toilet paper flowers. I love America… but I love Americana even more! And if this isn’t Americana I don’t know what is!

The waving girls, in their formals, elegant elbow-length gloves, teased hair and tiaras are crowned royalty of the annual Joshua Tree Turtle Races. I have no idea what happened to the royals, but I do know what happened to the turtle and the turtle races. The annual races, which began in 1946, were, by the early 70s, deemed “turtle abuse” and were shut down for good in 1975. The giant paper mâché turtle served as a prototype to a permanent cement “Myrtle Turtle” that remains to this day in Joshua Tree as a local mascot, displayed somewhere in the heart of town. I’ve never seen Myrtle in person, have you? When you do, please make sure to say hello… and send pix!

Once you pull your eyes away from the girls, the turtle, and that mesmerizing display of toilet paper flowers, it’s time to savor the super signage of America’s first nation wide supermarket chain, A & P. Just as the store front informs us, A & P Food Store was established in 1859, in NYC to be exact. A & P is short for Atlantic Coffee and Pacific Tea Co. Not only did A & P sell food, they entertained and informed too. In 1924, A & P Radio Hour became the first nation-wide radio program. In 1928 they began publishing Woman’s Day Magazine, which remains on newsstands, and my mother’s magazine rack, to this day. A & P is now celebrating 150 years!

Here’s to Myrtle Turtle and her royal court, toilet paper flower covered Chrysler products, A & P and YOU!

Los Angeles, CA
February 18, 2010

I love a beautiful family portrait! But never more than when the family is posed in front of a canned ham trailer and least two of them are dressed alike. In this case its his and hers Hawaiian print shirts. Truly inspired!

The trailer, with its door and windows open like its saying “ahhhh,” is nothing less than stunning. That sea foam green and custard yellow two-tone finish is gorgeous! How much are we lovin’ the deep blue desert sky reflected in the aluminum window frames and the honey blond wood screen door with burnt orange curtains gathered like moms brown mustard skirt. And if you like Venetian blinds the way I do there are some of those hangin’ in that trailer too! Don’t miss the classically cuffed Levi’s. If this isn’t Americana I don’t know what is!

UPCOMING SHOWS FEB 19 & 20
Speaking of PALM SPRINGS… I hope you can make it to my RETRO SLIDE SHOW there Friday night, FEB19 at the ACE HOTEL. Come early for the vintage trailer show and… to meet my Portland pals, Jeff and Kelly, (I call them “Jelly”) of Vintage Roadside, who will be peddling their amazing T-shirts! It’s all part of Palm Springs Modernism Week. FUN!

If you you’re not desert bound perhaps you can make it to the world’s greatest Camellia showplace, DESCANSO GARDENS, (located just 15 minutes north of downtown LA, in La Canada,) for my RETRO SLIDE SHOW Saturday night, FEB 20. Have you ever had a Camellia Martini? Neither have I. This is your chance! As always, festive dress is encouraged but not expected!

Here’s to Trailer Family Portraits, Palm Springs Modernism Show, Descano’s Camellia Forrest and YOU!

Los Angeles, CA
February 10, 2010

A man posing between a beautiful bongo drum and colorful display of plastic wrapped jazz albums predicts the Pee-Wee Herman look. Strike a pose there is nothing to it! That gray glen plaid suit over a white shirt finished with a red bow tie is in no uncertain terms an AMERICANA classic of the highest order. And so is Pee-Wee.

Speaking of…I went to see his new live “Pee-Wee’s Playhouse” show here in LA the other night. When the curtain opened and I saw the Playhouse set it didn’t take me long to figure out that this had to be the most incredible set I’ve ever seen on a stage. Whatta thrill it was to see Pee-Wee walk out on that stage. The audience went wild. He looks great! It was quite the flashback-to-the-80s thrill to spend an hour and half in the Playhouse with him and the whole gang. The “secret word” was ‘FUN’ and it was! My imagination was inspired and spirit soared!

Actually I never did see the beloved Pee-Wee’s Playhouse show when it originally aired on CBS Saturday mornings for five seasons beginning in 1986. Which reminds me of the time I was with Paul- Pee-Wee-Herman-Rueben’s several years ago on a trip to the Adirondacks in beautiful upstate NY. We were both guests, along with several others, at a mutual friends’ family camp on a beautiful lake. One morning while everyone was deciding what to do that day I said, “does anyone want to go with me to Enchanted Forrest, the all original, 1956 children’s fairy tale theme park?” It was just up the road and I really wanted to see it. Everyone said, “no thanks,” but Paul.

The next thing I knew I was the passenger in the front seat of his big Buick rent-a-car and we were speeding thru the woods on our way. We got there and the place was even better than I had hoped. He had no shortage of fans gawking even with his baseball-cap-and-sunglasses disguise. The whole time I’m saying to myself, I just can’t believe I’m at the Enchanted Garden with Pee-Wee Herman! The most memorable moment of our excursion came on the ride back to camp when I told him that I had never seen even one episode of Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. Immediately he pulled over the car to the side of the road and said “Get out of the car!” I still laugh about that.

Here’s to Pee-Wee, his playhouse, big adventure, the wannabe and YOU!

Los Angeles, CA
February 3, 2010

This is not an art installation in a snooty, big city gallery or museum. (Although it could be and should be.) This is the perky polka dotted wall of a sunshine state souvenir stand dressed with dozens kooky characters. They are to coconuts what tiki gods are to palm tree trunks. Each is hanging there just waiting to be bought, bagged and taken to a new, more permanent home like a patio, tiki bar or rumpus room. Each one has been carefully carved, painted and finished by hand then imported from the exotic island it came from for our pleasure.

Together on the wall they’re certainly mesmerizing and nearly hypnotizing. They look at you every time you walk in the room. No two are exactly the same. Each has his, (or her) own personality. I’m not sure that today they would all pass the test of political correctness. Which one would you choose? Or do you just want them all?

Among the many reasons that coco palms are among my favorites in the world of trees is the fact that they give us coconuts, some up to 100 a year. (Thank you coco palms!) We eat the hearts out of palms too. They also give us milk. And if you need, or want to, you can even build yourself a nice tropical hut out of a palm tree too. Do palms ever stop giving?

I was never cuckoo for Coca Puffs. (Give me Lucky Charms or Captain Crunch any day.) But I’ve always been cuckoo for coconut. Put the word coconut in front of shrimp, cake, cream pie, macaroons and milk and you’ve got yummy, yummy in your tummy. Mix it with pineapple and you’ve got the ultimate exotic tropical isle taste treat sensation of the highest order!

The word coconut is so much fun to say too. But why are coconuts called coconuts when they are neither cocoa nor nuts. Hmmm! Confusing aren’t they. They’re not even fruits. According to coconut experts, they are seeds. If I plant one will it grow?

Here’s to coconuts, coconut characters, coco palms and YOU!

January 21, 2010
Los Angeles

This is what happens when a playground equipment designer watches the movie Frankenstein one too many times on the late, late show. The screws are a dead giveaway.

It’s a playful tribute to the sci-fi superstar stylized as a cross between a giant toy robot and birdcage with googly eyes, and long reaching arms that double as side-by-side slides.

Beautifully finished in a striking shade of bright orange the monster stands out in the master planned suburban scale sandbox his feet are stuck in.

Three floors up two children play inside his head while a young lady is hunched over on the first floor of his two-story torso. He is part observation deck, part thrill ride, part jungle gym, and part pop art for the park.

By any playground standards, artistic or otherwise, before or since, this park monster is amazing!

Here’s to he monster, the playful pop art in the park and YOU!

January 16, 2010
Los Angeles